Joni-Rae Carrack

365 Days of Recovery

Day 80/1/2/3


Im very tired and getting tired of being tired πŸ’€ 
So Ive let this slide again! Its not looking good is it!
Im really trying to do a post everday or every other day and I guess its been a bit of a fail. Not a bad one. Its a learning experience.
Im really struggling with fatigue at the mo and Im seeing just how much of a problem it is. Its getting in the way of a lot of things I want to do, including this. I think to myself β€œI need to do this” and I can feel the tiredness drag at the thought, I can feel my brain sinking at the effort to plan what comes next to complete a task. My brain and my body feel so tired at the mo that Im struggling to hold conversations or write coherent sentences. I keep looking back and thinking does any of this make sense?
Thing is Im not sure what the fatigue means.
Is it the fatigue which has come from working hard and feeling stressed and the solution is a proper break and a genuine rest (not the kind where I feel guilty for most of it)
Or is it a symptom of depression where I want to sink into bed and not get up and is something to fight against and get on despite of it. 
Is it a mixture of both? Im worried that what I think is a rest is going to take me further away from recovery. 
Still waiting for some talking therapy and hopefully someone will be able to give me some guidance.
Otherwise Im going to try and rest