Joni-Rae Carrack
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365 Days of Recovery

Day 64

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Woah, that was a big gap. Photo is my current mental health tracker Im having a go at, and you can see the gap here too!
Nothing bad happened dont worry, if anything I had a lot of good happen and there wasnt anything pressing I felt I needed to comment at. I went and performed, the show went really well, met a lovely young lady who gave me faith in said show again and how it can help said young people, got to my parents home, celebrated my wedding anniversary, ate too much cake, got back home home, then just crashed out. 
I think the fatigue had been building up for a very long time and performing my show drew a good bold line under what was a very stressful start of the year. My body demanded I stayed vertical but not in a horrible flu like way I had felt before but in the “now its time to relax” and I could relax for the first time in ages. Looking back, it was a long time coming and I was starting the struggle in the last weeks. But its a relief to put something aside that had been grinding away at me. 
And that meant stepping back from this as well. Which is okay. It felt like an obligation and I needed to just loosen my grip on that so it didnt start to feel something to be stressed about. Hopefully normal reflection will resume or I will do shorter posts.
Or maybe videos
Who knows.
It feels like to start again without starting again
Like popping to the services on my recovery journey. ;)

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